When i arrived home today,

my dad has started copying the video tapes into another format

and those videos are my past...................... i've changed a lot~

actually everything changes time by time

when u are not adopted to it....... u might feel uncomfortable

if u are able to deal with it       it might actually do u loads of good

when others blame u     it doesnt necessarily be ur own fault

but might turn out to be he or she is not empathetic enough

Try to think in others position

and u will know how each one involved would be feeling

and when u speak ............ think of others feeling first

for wt u do , even a slightest act, would build an image in others mind

so........... hv Empathy~

When others said that u hv changed, does it really bother u much??

if ys, u'll hv to think about which chain happened to be improper~

certainly there is sth in between that gone wrong

or sth is being misunderstood~

and yet, it is really hard to make All things clear as crystal to everybody

esp. those who wont be able to understand u..............i think u all would be able to distinguish those~[if not juz ask me~~]

u dont needa actually tell them the whole truth but......... make things clear to urself

and it is always easier to make judgements .......... dont doubt, juz trust

asking others is just a mean to get feedbacks, or a better pt of view maybe~~

which might not help much in the whole situation even though u can get more info.

yet, when u started asking , u hv already given an answer in ur heart

others words would deviate ur own thought and plan for action

Before doing anything , Be wise~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

there are so many uncertainties in life

and we can only face a little in our school life

if u are unable to accept the fact that

Things Dont Always Go As You've Planned

u are juz doomed to failure~~

Dont always expect that I would be able to

accept ur everything........

For I am I and u are u

Dont treat me as if i am ur toy

I AM AN INDIVIDUAL BODY

GIVE ME SOME PRIVATE SPACE

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

dont get the wrong msg**請勿對號入座

for if u get the wrong one u will never know wt i feel~

juz wanna share with u my dear

everything SEEMS to be in a fine mood and run so smoothly until Summer asked me a question~

that make me think deeply ~~ about past, present and future

and with the song Chloe hv been singing to me all day long these weeks

it's really time for me to do a little reflection ~~ as always when i type my xanga xD

In my past, i've always thought to myself saying things like

" u've already done ur very very best, and it's time for u to take a rest"

when it is not at all the best time to do so

I've always been a seemingly hard-working student as a matter of fact that

no one actually sees my true self

i've never been able to push myself hard enough to strive for the best

and i lost loads of chances ........... which many i now regret

when the feeling of regret fills me up ........ i always say to myself

" If i do this better....... If i do that better........"

when that is always that fact that these If~s would never happen

" I cant return i can only look behind from where i can ........."

then....... i set goals for myself~ which are unable for me to reach.......... or just to hv a single glimpse at it

the final stuff i get to is ~~ U've got to strive hard in ur past so to hv a bright future

that's wt life is like

when u realise it............ it's already too late to do sth to make it in a right place

many times hv i set goals for myself ............. many times hv i failed them myself

never would i be able to grab hold of one single dream in my life

that would bring me up to the place i wanna be

and i hv to change my mind ......... work on that ......... and fail myself again

all these repeat ............ in a circle

and that's so-called " The Circle Game "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When it comes to separation

emotions are like tsunami

frds are not with me

some in other classes, or other countries

even those with me ............ study other sub.s

not a single common pt between us

how would my life be going on

lacking faith............ truely now is the biggest problem for me

which require loads of power to overcome

wtsoever can make me mad and yell from teh bottom of my heart

maybe the weather.......... maybe the devil in my heart

and i've noticed that i've changed ......................

lost my politeness , calm........................

and even my thinking skill =="

Wishing to say goodbye to all these

and, as Angel said

" everything start all over again in these up-coming 1 1/2 yrs "

Strive for the best ~~

Doom and Gloom ~

With luck [or maybe blessing from God]

i can get a place in shcc with such a low mark =="

but i would like to stress on ONE pt .................

i dont like to be DOUBT!!!!

wt they are talking about is that they are AFRAID that i might take

the wrong path and WASTE two years

yet...... wt they are thinking deep in their mind is that

they DOUBT my ability to score a better score in A-level

[though many say that A-level's grade will be lower for two grade than ce grade]

Am i really a doom in their lives??

did i make their smooth-ful lives a rough one??

i hv to admit that i am a LAZY girl

not at all willing to do pp and exercise

and my life deserve such a mark

but that's not a good-enough reason to ask me NOT to study A-level

cant they just trust me for one more time??!!??!!

that i hv the ability to learn and understand and score well in al

yet............. i've got the answer in heart for long

that they would never hv trust me for a single time

nor will they listen to wt i mostly want

and hv things done in their ways

I have no power over my destiny ................. sigh~

Last night ......... i was worrying about today's weather

[coz i saw orange cloud up in the sky]

This morning , i thz God for giving me such good weather

when i wake up =) [it might not last long]

anyway~ Good weather Good Day

wish me all the best in the coming days =)

Happy 17